With May has come a certain realisation. In recent months I had been getting overwhelmed by the things that are important to me. But I *may* (fingers crossed) have found a way to get rid of this pit of the stomach feeling.
The bottom line is that there is a lot of things going on. Children and family life, writing and blogging, house renovations and gardening; never mind about time for me.
The trickiness is prioritising any of these, because they all seem important to me. And that I need to achieve notable amounts of substance for each area of these, each day, week and month. These are hard things to balance. And the result of not doing so is being overwhelmed.
I was talking with a friend this month, who also happens to be a life coach. I asked her about a decision I was trying to make, but the conversation turned from the decision itself to why exactly I find decision-making hard (very hard!).
Through this conversation she introduced me to the GROW model of goal setting and decision-making. As she talked to me about it, all I could think of was the million and one goals that I have buzzing in my brain and how to explore how I would achieve them.
That’s overwhelm right there!
But overnight my brain took it all in.
And the next morning I realised that the most important thing in my life right now is not feeling overwhelmed. So that I have adequate capacity to achieve what I can and make decisions about things that matter.
The plain truth is that when I feel overwhelmed I feel out of control and panicky. I don’t get things done and the feeling is only perpetuated.
I turned it all on its head.
I made my goal not an achievement, not a thing, but the attainment of not being overwhelmed. Each and every day to be able to wake up and go to bed without this feeling.
Hard to be SMART with a goal that is about a feeling but essentially it required me to re-evaluate my other goals to be realistic and focused about what I can achieve.
I am so grateful that the conversation and the model have allowed me to see my priorities in a different light. I don’t have to be overwhelmed and the only person making me feel like that is myself. I can be kinder to myself.
If I stick to the possible, not the overwhelming, small steps will lead me to big ones.
I am grateful that because of this, on all fronts, I have made moves forward rather than backwards this month. At times it has felt heavy and onerous, and at others exciting and audacious. The difference between the two is how much I have expected of myself.
I am choosing to let go of the expectations. I am choosing to grow. I am choosing not to be overwhelmed.